[Coco] [Fwd: Math news]

[Steve Ostrom]

Just thought I'd pass this one along.  Being a former math major, I 
found it humorous.

-- Steve --



AP NEWS BULLETIN


At New York's Kennedy Airport today, an individual, later discovered to 
be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while 
in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule and a 
calculator.

Attorney General John Ashcroft believes the man is a member of the 
notorious Al-gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons 
of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a very fearsome cult, indeed," 
Ashcroft said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and 
sometimes go off on a tangent in a search of absolute value. They 
consist of quite shadowy figures, with names like "x" and "y," and, 
although they are frequently referred to as "unknowns," we know they 
really belong to a common denominator and are part of the axis of 
medieval with coordinates in every country. As the great Greek 
philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every triangle."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had 
wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have 
given us more fingers and toes."
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